tonight I think I'm only an afterthought. just my luck with girl friends? I'd like to be included in immediate plans sometimes, I guess. or maybe I don't really fit in with the group, missed too many saturday night shifts that time, or let the exboyfriend have the supper times supposed to be spent with them. I don't really know. it's tiring to be the one trying to keep up sometimes, even though I'm sitting here, just opposite. I'm really sorry, because I know the hard times would have been alot crappier without you all there.

but on the other hand, recounting cj days, laughing about all kinds of weird antics and stories, "and he fell through the bracken!" made me pretty darn happy.